Has anyone else ever had a meltdown? You know that moment when you lose all the self control you have in a public place. And mine is even worse because when I cry my face gets all blotchy red and I look really bad.
Well, I had mine a couple weeks before Christmas. As most of you know I have a child who has not had so healthy of a life (Isaac). Well, my youngest child JJ who is 4 is one if my "healthy" children. Well this day was different.
I had taken the older two kids to school and left JJ at home with Ben because he was still sleeping (which was unusual but not alarming). I was going to go for a run but I sat down by the fireplace to talk to Ben for a few minutes first. After a little while JJ came down the stairs and climbed on my lap and went back to sleep. (getting more unusual). He didn't feel warm but I took his temp anyway and it was normal. I aroused him and asked if anything hurt and he said his legs hurt and went back to sleep (even more unusual). I kept telling Ben something is not right. I called the pediatrician and they said bring him in right away. He was still able to be aroused but kept falling asleep. I put him in his car seat and told Ben I'd call him at the doctor's office.
On the way to the doctor, JJ woke up to say "Mom, God and I are looking at the mountains. Aren't they beautiful?" I replied "Yes they are" but that comment about he and God looking at the mountains together paired with this excessive sleepiness really left me unsettled (now alarming). My mind jumped to all sorts of places.
I got to the doctors office and went in the waiting room. He was so angelic looking. I started crying. There was one lady in the room with me and she asked if I was ok. I bet she wished she would have kept quiet :) because this is where the meltdown comes. I really started crying when she asked. Through loud sobs and the red blotchy face I said "This is my healthy child. I can't go through watching another child be so sick. What if he has leukemia. He just won't wake up". The lady and her child got up and walked over to me. The mom put her hand on my shoulder and prayed for JJ and me. It was the sweetest thing ever and helped calm me back down. I didn't even get her name but she was my Angel that day.
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| JJ in his sleepy "Anglic" time |
To answer your question of why my mind would jump to leukemia. Due to Isaac being sick I know more than I want to sometimes about medical things and leg pain can be a sign of leukemia. The nurse came and got us right away. The doctor met us in the room. By this time JJ was sleeping almost all the time. They checked all his vitals which were normal. The doctor was in his face yelling his name and he just kept sleeping. She decided to call the ambulance. Ben was already almost to us and got there right as they were taking him out to the ambulance. Since I had my meltdown already I was able to be the mommy he needed and be there for him.
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| JJ on his ambulance ride |
On the way to the ER they decided to check his blood sugar. It was 40. Which would cause the sleepiness. They gave him oral glucose which he proceeded to throw up all over the hallway in the ER. So they decided to give it to him by IV in the ER. This worked immediately and while he was still kind of out of it the rest of the day he was awake. He has been diagnosed with Ketotic Hypoglycemia. Which is a childhood form that he can grow out of as his liver grows. We just need to monitor with a glucose meter and provide frequent meals and snacks. And make sure to watch him very close when he gets a stomach bug.
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| How JJ looked most of the day in hospital |
So yes I had my meltdown. But God knew what I needed at that moment. Once again he showed up for me when I needed extra help. Once again He didn't let me know the outcome right then but let me know He was in control. I have always loved Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." (If only I could remember it before the meltdowns). ?)) ). I know one of these days I won't have the outcome I want and my faith will be tested even more. I pray that when that happens I will remember all these time God has sent his Angels to protect me.
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| Our JJ |
